Yikes! (Insert Jeopardy! theme music here)

So I came home from work, had dinner, futzed about, watched the news, talked to my sister on the phone, and then –

Holy cats! I almost forgot about the Jeopardy! test! 

I have been taking the test for this show for years … It was more fun when it was me and a bunch of other people in a room with pens and paper.  That I can do.  This, having to sit and wait and then type frantically yet legibly? Yick.

OK.  I’m logged in, and have 37 minutes and 57 seconds to kill.  It tells me so.  In big letters.  Real calm-inducing, folks. 

I don’t know why I’m nervous and fumble-fingered about the whole thing – I already know I’m going to bomb.  I can slaughter the contestants when I’m watching the show (I beat my hero Ken Jennings once!), but these tests are murder.  A question comes on screen, and you have 15 seconds to read it and type your answer.  While keeping one eye on the clock and another on your fingers and another on the screen to make sure what is typed there is what I meant to type there.  Which is three eyes.  And no, I’m not miscounting because I’m fidgeting because I have 31 minutes left. 

Last year I studied, trying to brush up geography and sports.  This year I didn’t; there seemed to be no point.  I can’t possibly learn the primary rivers of all the countries in the world in a couple of days … I just wish there was some way to know how badly – or, you know, well – I do.  There apparently isn’t, without keeping track of the questions asked and checking the answers.  Which is hard. 

Well.  I think I’ll go watch the clock count down.  Here goes nothin’.

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2 Responses to Yikes! (Insert Jeopardy! theme music here)

  1. Riley Martin says:

    After performing downright horribly on the 2011 Jeopardy Online test, I immediately searched for solace. I needed to find a blog or a forum where I could commiserate with other chagrined and humbled Jeopardy wannabes. I needed to know that I wasn’t the only one whose fragile ego was once again utterly foundered in all of 750 seconds. (That’s 50 questions times 15 seconds per question. Why couldn’t they have had a math question on that cursed exam!)

  2. stewartry says:

    Solace, indeed – I need a drink. Or chocolate. Or a chocolate drink. That was awful. I managed to take screencaps of the questions, and checked my answers, and … I believe my performance qualifies me for FEMA aid. Why do we do this to ourselves? Oh right.

    Is there a forum out there for the chagrined and humbled? Well, if not, everyone can come here for ego bandaids … It does help to know I’m not the only one – thanks!

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